A Look Back on 3 Years of Blogging (my last post…for a bit)

Hey girl hey. And boy.

I never thought the day would come where I would stop blogging but after a month of thinking about my intentions, purposes and long-term plans with this blog, I feel it is the best time, here on my 3rd year blogging anniversary, to say goodbye.

For now.

For a bit.

I just wanted to take a few minutes to reflect on the reasons I was blogging along the years so if you want to read a little bit of why I’m going to end off my blogging journey, keep on reading.


  • Why did you start blogging?

“I explain this a bit in my first postย but essentially, I wanted an outlet where I could share all things opinions, rants, tips, advice, recipes and more. I was passionate about so much and wanted to have a digital diary in a way to express my thoughts. I never thought Iโ€™d ever get likes or followers or anything like that (your sis didnโ€™t even know blogs had follow buttons ๐Ÿ˜‚). I originally wanted a Youtube channel but after a lot of consideration, I realized blogging was the best for me (plus, Zoellaโ€™s books had a lot to play in this decision haha).”

  • Why did you start blogging?

“I wanted a place to share my rants, opinions and tutorials. Kind of like a YouTube channel but blogs are anonymous and probably much safer because there arenโ€™t a lot of viewers and most people are open minded and kind. โ€“ Haha yes, I totally stole this from my interview with Beafree : click hereย if you want to read it. Oh and I also got a bunch of inspiration from the Girl Online books.”

  • Why did you start blogging?

“I always wanted to start a youtube channel but after thinking it through, I thought I had a bit more passion with writing. After reading Zoeโ€™s Girl Online books, I started a blog. I honestly just went for it and never thought Iโ€™d come across the people I did but here we are. I had a lot of opinions and advice I wanted to get out into the world and it was more of an online diary than anything but Iโ€™m so glad I got to be part of this amazing community. I am going to say that Iโ€™m reaching a weird stage of blogging where itโ€™s taking a lot of time and energy to get one post out, let alone interact and read other blog posts. If any of you have tips on blogging efficiency or just blog and life management, do let me know!”


 

Aww I love this. And I think my three years of blogging has helped me express myself and be able to communicate the things that I’m passionate about. But for so long, my post’s purpose was just ‘to entertain’. So it was me ranting about or reacting to funny things and just trying to make others smile. And that’s beautiful. I still want others to smile. But not in the way of a blog post that makes them forget about their problems temporarily. I want to get to the root of our problems and really express the meaning of life.

My posts on Bayance were all about me. What I’m making, questions I’m answering about myself, what I’m doing every month. Now, I don’t feel the need to share it with the world anymore. My years of ‘expressing myself’ have come to an end. I want to live experiences, not take pictures and videos of them. I want to reflect on me for me, not for the entertainment of someone else. But what I do want to do with others is help them find the reason they’re here and promote justice, love, open-mindedness and all of that.

I don’t want to share things about me anymore.

It’s the reason I left social media. Social media gave everyone a platform to share what they were up to and suddenly it’s just become this toxic ego-feeding platform of comments and likes and views. And who looks better? And who’s living a better life?

And suddenly, that spilled into blogging. I thought I could escape it because blogging wasn’t about how you looked and how many likes you had. But the numbers and this seeking of validation was still there. I felt myself commenting on other people’s posts and engaging with other bloggers just so I can generate an audience or “return the favour” of people who commented on mine.

And I hated that.

Why was I pouring my time into skimming multiple posts just so I can keep up with my audience or expand my following?

I wanted to expand my blog but I had no energy to read others’ posts just for the sake of my own self-gain.

Blogging began to drain me and it became like this chore that I wasn’t passionate about anymore.

And when I think about my long term plan for this blog or just my purpose in life, I found that a). I had no long term plan – it’s just entertainment and b). It wasn’t serving my purpose.

I want to dedicate my life to serving others and serving Allah and I found this type of lifestyle blogging just didn’t fit into either one. Every time I would finish an action that had to do with my purpose like Islamic education or Quran or talking to others about meanings of life and themes in the Quran, I would feel so empowered. Like there was light in my chest.

But every time I got up from blogging or talking to a friend about meaningless topics, I felt so down. Like I wasted so much time on something empty.

And don’t get me wrong – some of the posts I wrote were meaningful and sparked amazing conversation and the posts you guys write are just so empowering. But I found myself just finding so many posts that I wrote as just…empty.

I tried to ignore this feeling for the longest time but I can’t anymore.

When I came to think about how I will answer for my time on the day of judgement and how blogging took such a big portion of it, what would I say?

What I’m trying to say is that there is so much content like mine out there (DIYs, recipes, life hacks..etc) and I want to steer my focus now to things like meanings of life, value systems, societies and things like that. And because I want to shift my audience from this small open minded one here on WordPress to a more general and wide-reaching audience, I think I’m going to actually look into film production and Youtube.

It’s funny because I started blogging with “I originally wanted to start Youtube but I think I like writing more” and I’m so grateful for that. I’m glad that I was blogging during these three years of change so that I can enter Youtube not with the mindset of “me me me” but more “let’s look at life together, let’s clarify things together…etc”.

So I don’t want to say that I “quit” blogging. It’s just a break for now until I renew my intentions, educate myself more on the topics I want to discuss, look into script writing and film. And hopefully one day I will rebrand this blog and you will hear from me again with a new set of content.

This is my last post…for a bit.

And if I don’t come back, I guess life is a “bit” itself, isn’t it?

I’ll try my best haha.

But the next time I’m back, I’ll probably go self-hosted and take blogging a little more seriously than a side hobby for when I’m bored. Because frankly, I’m not bored anymore. So whatever I put my time into, I really want it to be meaningful or relevant to my book of deeds.

Blogging has helped me so much over the years and I will forever be grateful for this amazing family of beautiful and open-minded people. You guys are seriously amazing and I truly wish you the best with your own blogging journey. Mine is coming to an end (at least ‘Bayance’ – and hey, your sis is a a grandma after all – it’s the circle of life) but I hope you go amazing places with yours and find meaning within your posts.

I will pop in every once in a while to comment on some of your posts if I’m on a road trip or just looking for something to read on the go. And this is just the end to Bayance, not blogging. I do plan on coming back down the road to start writing again under a different intention like I mentioned earlier.

I will always remember you. And I’ll leave my site the way it is if you wanted to read over my old content (and I personally will be doing that every once in a while haha). And here’s my first ever blog post if you wanted to read it:ย Welcome to my Blog. My thumbnail today is quite nostalgic if I do say so myself.ย  ๐Ÿ˜‚

Also wanted to acknowledge yawm Arafat today for all the Muslims fasting and celebrating this blessed day right before Eid. What a blessed day to end my current blogging journey with and I want to wish you an AMAZING and blessed Eid tomorrow. May you and your loved ones enjoy the celebration. An early Eid Mubarak here from yours truly. (Ka’ak, here I come ๐Ÿ˜‚)

Thank you all for making my time at Bayance an amazing one. And I hope we cross paths again.

I’ll see you….in a bit.

Good-bayyy. ๐Ÿ’ž

51 thoughts on “A Look Back on 3 Years of Blogging (my last post…for a bit)

  1. arshia says:

    As much as I will miss seeing your posts around, I feel like this a wonderful step you’ve taken for yourself. The fulfilment you talk about wanting is so very beautiful, and I wish you all the very best on this new journey of self-exploration and introspection. I really hope that you bring into your life the light that you need, and I’m sure you will too! Lots of love to you :))

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Gracie says:

    I may or may not have a few tears in my eyes right now haha, but I just want to say that I am so proud of everything you’ve achieved and the hugely positive impact you’ve had in the blogosphere โค Your posts have been some of my all time favourites and I have learnt SO much from your perspective. It has meant a lot to me to see another young person out there who thinks a bit differently and is passionate about positive change. I've appreciated all your support on my blog and I'm crazy proud of you for taking this step as well :)) I would love to keep in touch if you'd like to? Though no pressure of course! โค Sending much love xx

    Liked by 3 people

    • Bayance says:

      Aww omg thank you so much for this heart-warming comment. I literally look up to you so so much and ahh you give me so much hope for the future. Omg your posts have always stuck with me and I appreciate this comment so much!! Yesss. You can always email me and if you have WhatsApp or something we can text as well. Do let me know and I will check back in my Readers every once in a while to see what you’re up to so this is it for my writing on this blog for now but not the end to supporting all of you. โค๏ธ Right back at you!!

      Liked by 3 people

  3. Elsie LMC says:

    Truly going to miss seeing posts from you! ๐Ÿ˜Ÿ Your words resonate a lot and I hope that when you return (because I like to think that you will or else I’ll go mad and that’ll be on YOUR shoulders! ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜‚) the path you take will be clear. Wishing you the best of luck with everything โœจ๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•

    Liked by 2 people

    • Bayance says:

      OML hahah thank you so much ๐Ÿ˜‚ and yess I do hope so too!! You phrased this so well and I thank you for writing your post a month ago because it truly got me thinking long term. Thank you for your support and content! I wish you all the best as well!! ๐Ÿ’ž

      Liked by 1 person

  4. autumngirl says:

    Oh my goodness I will miss you so much! You have come so far since your first posts Mashallah and I am sure the future holds wonderful things for you In’shaa’allah, I hope you and your family have a blessed Eid, Khair Mubarak, I’ll forever keep you in my duaas and I hope to see a post from you pop up in my feed sometime in the future, but until then have a wonderful time, chase your dreams, pray, stay safe and most of all enjoy yourself lovely! xx

    Liked by 2 people

    • Bayance says:

      Ameen!! Thank you so so much. inshAllah! Eid Mubarak to you too love ๐Ÿ’ž. You as well!! Thank you so much you made my heart melt – thank you thank you thank you! ๐Ÿ˜ญ๐Ÿ’ž

      Liked by 1 person

  5. hiddenzzzzz says:

    Aww.. I feel sad to see you leaving the blogosphere (even if it’s for a bit) Your posts are always my favorite. I was happy and proud to see someone talking about Islam and spreading it here. May Allah bless you! I understand how blogging can have negative impacts on your life too. Back in april-may, I realized that blogging took so much time and energy and I often lose motivation to write posts. In Ramadan, I realized that when it came to important stuffs like practice my religion, blogging felt like a chore. I respect your decision and I hope you’ll find what you really want to do next. Whether it is to continue blogging or to start film making, whatever makes you happy and satisfied will eventually make you live peacefully.
    Good luck and see you (in a bit ๐Ÿ˜‚) May Allah guide you to the right path! I’ll miss your posts ๐Ÿ’•

    Liked by 2 people

    • Bayance says:

      I’ll miss you too!! ๐Ÿ’ž (But will be stalking you from time to time hehe). Tysmmm that means so much! Yours too! ๐Ÿ’— I feel youuu and tysm for understanding. Ty ty ty โค๏ธ

      You tooo!! ๐Ÿ’ž Eid Mubarak and tysm for this comment!!

      Liked by 1 person

  6. infinitelyadaydreamer says:

    Eid Mubarak my lovely! We’ll miss you around here on the blogosphere but I can’t wait to catch up on some of your older posts. You share such quality content but I understand your need to step back, refocus and come back better than ever when the time is right. Wishing you all the best for what is to come. What’s most important is that you do what is right for you and feel the joy in things again. Sending love and light beautiful friend x

    Liked by 2 people

  7. Amber says:

    Iโ€™m going to miss you so much but I totally respect you for making that decision. I used to love making lifestyle videos, Iโ€™d be so proud of people watching them and liking and commenting and then I was like โ€˜hold up, who are you doing this for?โ€™ because it just became too much. Honestly I have so much respect for you making this choice, maybe one day our paths and maybe they wonโ€™t, but thatโ€™s okay. I think youโ€™re starting an incredible journey and honestly I wish you all the luck in the world. You have made me smile and laugh more times than I can count Bay so thank you, I wish you all the best in life and see you… in a bit! ๐Ÿ˜‚ Also you lowkey may have made me cry. Itโ€™s shark week though, thatโ€™s my excuse ๐Ÿ˜… Itโ€™s just youโ€™ve been there for me from the start and I honestly think you are such an incredible person but I am so proud of you for doing this!! Now thatโ€™s darling, never forget your British Queen xx ๐Ÿ˜˜

    Liked by 2 people

    • Bayance says:

      Ahhhh Amber I’m going to miss you so much too!! โค I'm so glad you understand!! Yesss I really hope they do and sis I will definitely try to pop in and stalk some of your blog posts every once in a while – I need to read your future book! โค Thank you so so much I literally can't explain how much this comment means to me! OML sis don't cryyy I'm not dying or anything (for now oop) and I'll email you to catch up from time to time too. โค Tysm!!! โค Ta ta. Never! โค

      Liked by 1 person

      • Amber says:

        Yes!! ๐Ÿ˜ญ Of course! Awh thatโ€™s so sweet, you really donโ€™t have to because Iโ€™m sure youโ€™ll be busy ๐Ÿ™‚ Oh yes haha donโ€™t miss out on that! Of course and Iโ€™m glad I could wish you a good goodbye ๐Ÿ’“ Awh Iโ€™m okay and haha! That would be really nice, do send me an email on how everything is goi g with you, even if itโ€™s twice a year ๐Ÿ˜‚ Of course. Yes, ta ta!! :โ€™)

        Liked by 2 people

  8. Amina says:

    Bay! Iโ€™ve loved reading your blog and I definitely understand why youโ€™re stepping away for a bit. Thanks for making me laugh and inspiring me with your posts! Best of luck on your journey and Eid Mubarak โ™ฅ๏ธ

    Liked by 2 people

  9. hopelesslystrong says:

    It’s going to be sad to see you go! But I resonate with everything you said and 100% completely understand. I took like MULTIPLE breaks over the years because blogging went from something to enjoy to something that felt like a chore. Like I was doing it for the likes and views instead of doing it for me and I hate that feeling. So I hope you find what you’re looking for! And if you do or don’t come back, I hope your life is fulfilled and happy! I’m so glad to have met you on this platform ๐Ÿ˜Šโค

    Liked by 2 people

  10. xoxlucy says:

    Wow, Iโ€™m kind at loss of words to say. I was off blogging for a month and I come back and you declare your leaving๐Ÿฅบ๐Ÿ˜ญ I just want to let you know that through your blogging you have touched me along with Iโ€™m sure many other people! Your blog was the first I read on WordPress and while, I have only been here for the tail end of your blogging journey, you have entertained me, taught me and made me smile and laugh.
    I do understand why you need to stop. Social media is something I also find very toxic and itโ€™s important to live your life to the fullest!

    Keep being your amazing self, giving advice and just being a bundle of joy!!๐Ÿฅบ๐Ÿ˜ญ( I promise Iโ€™m not tearing up in the slightest โค๏ธ๐Ÿ˜‚โค๏ธ).

    Liked by 1 person

    • Bayance says:

      This comment means so much tysmmm for understanding and ah your support just leads me to tears. I have been looking up to YOU for your amazing content and personality. I wish you all the best on your blogging journey and tysmm!
      (aha revenge for making Kleenex sue me for tearing up too much by your support when I was blogging) ๐Ÿ˜ญ๐Ÿ˜‚

      Liked by 1 person

  11. happily, hedy says:

    Aw, I only saw this post now but I knew I had to leave a comment. So sad to see you leaving, but 100% understand. I’ve often had similar feelings. And like you said, going self hosted and taking the emphasis away from lifestyle has definitely helped. I’ll miss your posts, but I’m very glad to have come across them and made an online friend like you ๐Ÿ™‚ Looking forward to see where you go next!

    โค Hedy

    Like

  12. Aditi says:

    Ahhh oh no I missed this!! I’m so sad to hear that you’re leaving, but I wish you the best in your life โค I have such fond memories of our blogging escapades, with the tissue box gang and all. I'll miss you so much! It's been a while but I'll send you an email right now โค I love You! Have an amazing life dearie!

    Like

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